Executives

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Sir Torquil carries on the long tradition of the Spoon family involvement in spoons. He is (almost) a direct descendent of the spoon’s inventor Malcombe Spoon and takes his responsibilities seriously, promoting spoons and their use tirelessly, whenever his health permits.

After inheriting his title and estates on the death of his father, Lord Henry Spoon, he promptly lost the lot in the dot com crash of the 90’s. After his well publicised breakdown, culminating with the now infamous “ Copthorn Roundabout” incident, he retreated from the spotlight and eventually recovered his mental capacities and is now clean.

He is the only person on the executive board with the surname of “Spoon”

A committed vegetarian and lifelong fan of Dana, he lives modestly with his partner Angelo and their two Persian cats on an estate in Crawley, spiritual home of the Spoon.

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Harry “Right” Bastard was made a Lord by the last government for his services to the Steel Industry in the north of England. He also bought a recent Prime Minister a large estate in Northumberland, which had nothing to do with it at all, as his lawyers will prove.

Known for his uncompromising attitude and colourful turns of phrase, he likes what he says and says what he b****y well likes. Having made several fortunes buying up steel mills, shutting them down and selling the land for out of town retail parks he enjoys lavishing money on his wife Phueng, who he met while on holiday on Thailand. He recently bought her a new ironing board cover and tumble drier in the sales.

Notoriously tight with his money, he owns most of South Yorkshire and divides his time between his stately home in Edlington and various homes in Lichtenstein, The Cayman Islands, Jersey and Thailand. He refuses to put an apostrophe in his surname in case he goes soft.

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Suki is the token woman on the male stronghold that is the executive board. A self-confessed control freak, she likes to see her role as the go-getting, thrusting media, marketing and PR guru, tirelessly promoting Spoons everywhere and anywhere she gets the chance.

In reality she’s there to make the Christmas party go with a swing and make sure there are biscuits at the meetings. Until recently she was a PR and marketing advisor to the PM having been married at the time to a junior Minister.

Four children from five, brief, marriages leave Suki’s nanny with very little free time but Suki is committed to her role, attending PR events and doing media interviews whenever she is asked. She once appeared on Richard and Judy as she bought a skinny de-caff sheep’s milk frappe from the café in the background as they interviewed Eddie “The Eagle” Edwards.

Suki (real name Wendy Utterthwaite) also enjoys a drink and a bet on the dogs.

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